A love letter to myself

Inspiration

It’s not because of me.

It’s now about me looking after myself. Putting myself first. It’s not about values for me. It’s about not wanting to be in a relationship where I’ve no idea what’s going on for my partner.  A partner who won’t or can’t share with me.

I live in my body.
I feel with every fiber of my being.
I break down I communicate.
I am vulnerable and open
I share how I feel to learn and communicate with my partner.
I will not my myself small or less to accommodate someone else.
I will be my authentic self even if that is larger than life
I wear my heart on my sleeve and there’s something beautiful about that.

I might have repeated my patterns about running away from things that scare me. But I can re frame that. I practice active self care. I will not slip back into dishonesty patterns because I know I am stronger than that. I will will honour my values and stand by them. I will keep being faithful to my journey but emotional and spiritual.  I am magnificent and a magical delicate flower. I don’t want to become tough or hardened.

It isn’t my fault if someone else is repressive.  This is a pattern of her behavior in many situations.  This time it was just something about me or the relationship she couldn’t handle or process.  This doesn’t mean I should change or become less. I must grieve what is lost and honour the truth that I wouldn’t have been happy long term repressing myself because someone else can’t accept all of me. Or because someone else cannot be open to communicate be open, support and work together with me.

If we could communicate and be vulnerable I believe we could work through anything any everything.  But that is outside of my control.  I can change someone or make them able to share and be vulnerable with how they feel. And nor do I want to do that.

Sometimes the thought of being open to someone new and going through the process of learning about each other is too much.  I’m scared hurting and don’t want to go through all this again.  But I can check this thinking how amazing it has been to love wholeheartedly. To commit myself to someone.  Not to hold anything back and feel like it was a beautiful thing even if only for a short time. That is a blessing. A friend I love and trust and hold dear that is precious.  But I can’t let her hurt my heart by withdrawing and repressing her feelings from me. That would never work for me.

I am strong
I am stable
I am grounded
I consider the risks
I plan before I do things
I am funny and can make people laugh
I am good at what I do
People respect me
I am have a desirable skill set
I am incredibly smart
I am worth it

I will not devalue myself or my worth

 



Well behaved women rarely make history

Inspiration

Throw me to the wolves and I will return leading the pack. Life shrinks or expands in proportion to ones courage. And so she decided to start living the way she’d imagined.

As someone who loves a woman who takes on opposition, the “never been done  before” and other crazy thoughts. Im really proud to have worked along side and with Julia Gillard. She can speak to a crowd flawlessly with a few moment prep, she’s human and relatable, she’s confident and hell she’s the first female prime minister Australia has had and did a pretty good job of it!



Seasonal Defective Disorder or Winter Blues part 6

Inspiration, Life
BRING ON SUMMER TIME!!  June, July and August in the Southern hemisphere are the crux of winter, often cold and wet in the more tropical countries and of course the days are shorter and darker and less sunny.

In many species, activity is diminished during the winter months in response to the reduction in available food and the difficulties of surviving in cold weather. Hibernation is an extreme example, but even species that do not hibernate often exhibit changes in behavior during the winter. It has been argued that SDD is an evolved adaptation in humans that is a variant or remnant of a hibernation response in some remote ancestor…  Yes I may have been hiding under my warm wee rock, but its cosy and safe.  I’ll surface soon

If you do find yourself with the winter blues, here are a few tips that have really helped me in the past month. Transitioning in two months from 37 degrees through to 3 degrees has been a little draining and daunting to lil  ole me who takes a bit to get acclimatized!

Here is no 6 of my easy and super fun things to try out that I’ve LOVED and all my pictures to go with it!

If your not happy – Do something about it

I was having lunch with a new friend this week, sitting looking out on to Brunswick Street talking about life. Otherwise known as randomly talking shit while people watching and indulging in delicious foods!  Fun.  Half  way through the conversation she caught me off guard saying “you seem like a real go-getter”.

I’ve never thought of myself like this, probably because I know how hard it is to motivate myself some days and one can talk all one likes and still struggle to get there.  However your go-getter-ness is all subjective I think, having contemplated it a little more.   It depends on who you surround yourself with and where you want to be or achieve in a certain time period.

I’d say I’m pretty determined to “Be that Someone” and I do have my 2-5-10 year goals all set out. (Which need re-visiting actually) However since coming to Melbourne I’ve really worked hard to surround myself with other high achievers.

Sometimes its AWESOME and motivating to get at it, but sometimes its depressing seeing everyone doing so well, and not think – “Why aren’t I doing that tooooo?”

(Can you hear in your head that silly whiny voice too?)   This is what I try to tell myself!

IGNORE IT.  YOU ARE AWESOME, ITS YOUR AGENDA NOT A COMPETITION. ENJOY IT!

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Seasonal Defective Disorder or The Winter Blues part 4

Inspiration, Life, Travel

They did say “Welcome to Melbourne” when we were complaining about numb toes!

If you do find yourself with the winter blues, here are a few tips that have really helped me in the past month. Transitioning in two months from 37 degrees through to 3 degrees has been a little draining and daunting to lil  ole me who takes a bit to get acclimatized!  

Here are 8 easy and super fun things to try out that I’ve LOVED and all my pictures to go with it!

Go on an adventure

We’ve family over this weekend from New Zealand so I am super excited to be playing the role of tour guide around Melbourne.  We’ve planned to go back to some of the places we have loved and run around the city to explore some new adventures.

I think the highlight of the weekend will be visiting an Asylum on a ghost tour.  Not the kind you wander around looking at the outside of spooking looking buildings but where you go  in, professional equipment and all!

If you’re feeling in that hideous rut, take a leaf out of my go-getter-book and put that sparkle back in your eye by looking forward to something.  We’ve found googling what to do in an area really highlights a number of things that we wouldn’t have even thought of doing initially.

ADVENTURE TIME!!!

xxx
Phlossy

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Seasonal Defective Disorder or The Winter Blues part 3

Inspiration, Life

If you do find yourself with the winter blues, here are a few tips that have really helped me in the past month. Transitioning in two months from 37 degrees through to 3 degrees has been a little draining and daunting to lil  ole me who takes a bit to get acclimatized!

They did say “Welcome to Melbourne” when we were complaining about numb toes!   Here are 8 easy and super fun things to try out that I’ve LOVED and all my pictures to go with it!!


Here is part 3 of my 8 easy and super fun things to try out that I’ve LOVED and all my pictures to go with it!

Wear bright colours (or hair)

I’ve always said its almost impossible to stay grumpy when you look like a walking rainbow.  Going out wearing all bright colours is a sure way to get compliments and turn heads.  I love, love, love the way little old ladies smile and the twinkle springs to their eye when they see my hair and realize it is indeed pink and not red!  If you are in fact more of a naturals girl then brighten your look up with coloured eyeliner or a colourful necklace..

ENJOY!!

xxx
Phlossy
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Furnishing your Dream House

Inspiration, Life

I’ve always been a dreamer and I love house decorating.  When I was out on the weekend at DFO I couldn’t help but snap pictures of these gorgeous items of furniture.  The princess within me wants to decorate my abode with fanciful luxuary.  Take a look and enjoy!

 

Button back couches, poofs, or bedheads – I have a complete weakness for you all.  “Get in moi house!”  There is such a sense of gratuitous opulence when you look at a well upholstered piece of furniture!  I’m not sure I’d use such busy wall paper and the lamp in the above photo is a tad boring but I’d take the couch in a heart beat.

One day I’m going to have part of my house open to use as a photography studio.   The number of times I’ve walked into a shop and wanted to drape myself glamorously over their stock has happened more times than I can keep count!

 I have a collection of pink appliances in my kitchen and nearly had kittens a couple of weeks ago when I went to Harvey Normans and saw an entire range of pink kitchen ware.  Despite knowing I’d possibly not use most of the appliances on a regular basis I STILL want them all decorating my bench.

 And just because I love you all my readers, here is a gorgeous girl with pink hair, doing her makeup in a pink bathroom.  It makes me smile – how can you not with so much pink.  It is even “scientifically” proven to have a positive effect on the brain.

Choose furniture that makes you enjoy being at home, your house is your castle!  It is worth the effort to decorate it right so when you’re home you are relaxed and enjoying your surroundings.  Even if it is covering the garden with solar powered fairy lights!

Trust me it works xxx

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